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Keeping the Family Together and Avoiding Family Conflict
After a death, especially the death of the last of the parents, family members’ emotions are high, nerves are raw, and with money being involved, it can be a very tense time for family members. No one is at their best.
We believe it is extremely important to handle estate matters in an open and transparent fashion. Everyone needs to realize that the person appointed as personal representative is the one to make final decisions in estate proceedings, but that everyone’s input is important and that everyone’s concerns need be addressed.
Our goal is for the family to become closer through our work with them as attorneys for the estate. We want to avoid having the family become distrustful of one another and become distant, as sometimes happen, especially after the second death.
We suggest approaches to your planning and to your family
after a death to result in maximizing the cooperation and minimizing conflict.
Often clients make specific bequests in their wills, giving
specific items to specific individuals and then state that after the surviving spouse has passed away that the personal property remaining, other than cash accounts and vehicles, goes to the children to be distributed equally as they agree. We like to add that if they do not agree, they then take turns selecting one item or one set of items in rotation. This usually helps the children to agree.
Previous: Handling of Assets (continued)
Next: Emotions After the Death of the Second Parent
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